Welcome to Personal Extracts- scripted manifestations of what I was thinking at complicated times of my life. Enjoy.

So- Time. Isn’t it the most peculiar thing to play such an important part in, well, just about anything? Just an abstract concept that we follow to the letter, or number in this case. Albert Einstein once suggested that time is relative, and that if you took a pair of identical twins, sent one of them into outer space, orbiting the Earth for 10 years or so, leaving the other here on the planet, then which one will appear to have aged the least? Have a think about it… Thought about it?…if you said the one in outer space, you’d be correct. As this is not a thrilling version of my A Level Physics textbook, I’m not going to go into the exact science of it, I’m merely going to state that time is a magnificent factor and at the same time a cruel and unpredictable mistress. Oh and the above jargon is known as the Twin Paradox Theory (Just incase you were wondering). It has been said that if you pay visual attention to an object, then you are seemingly affecting its physical existence, again, good old Al proclaimed that if you were to avert your attention away from the moon after observing it, then it would cease to exist. A bold statement to make wouldn’t you agree? Similar to Schroedinger’s analogy that if you were to place a cat into a opaque box, then it would be possible for said feline to be alive and deceased, simultaneously. But that’s just weird and if you were to try it at home…expect a court summons or a shafting from the NSPCA.

Science is completely mind boggling. Much like time, as it is for that matter, unfathomably difficult to imagine the creation of the universe over 14 billion years ago (Around 10,000 years if you’re by any means a god botherer. Sorry…not sorry). Having said that, nothing is too hard to decipher and unravel after copious amounts of alcohol, because alcohol is our friend and it will believe anything we say. *Disclaimer*: I’m not an alcoholic and I don’t have cysts on my liver. Me and my liver are very close and we have a catch up once a week over a pint.

Obtaining a genuine sense of time-at-work, requires you to experience something that has been affected by time, naturally. The Mayan Pyramids are an ideal example. It’s hard to grasp and imagine the surrounding area as it was back in the days of old, taking it at face value it’s seemingly just a compilation of old worn out limestone, but if you delve deeper, it’s much more. Now to create an idyllic image in ones head, one wouldn’t advise watching Mel Gibson’s “Apocalypto” as that’s just as far fetched and as low budgeted as “The Passion of the Christ”, and serves little purpose. The best option being trekking 7000 miles to Chitzen Itza. As droll and tedious as the journey may be, good things come to those who wait- which may be a soothing concept to most, but you cant wait forever. The world is changing. For better and for worse. Better for all of those who inherit power and worse for those who don’t. The routes of most evils derive from power accompanied by a side order of greed and a sprinkling of corruption. Nothing is sacred anymore, as a single race of beings, we alone have bitten a large fleshy chunk from the hand that feeds us. Power and money define us and no conflict can or will ever be resolved using the power of words – just the power of heavy artillery and a shiny red button. It would be nice to live life with no consequence, but having said that, I’m sure somewhere down the line that statement would be rebelled against by one tranquility-resistant group or another. Slay the anarchists perhaps? But then I suppose we’d have another ‘Cuban Missile’ epidemic and JFK would be rolling in his gold encrusted grave. Could it be that we were never meant to live harmoniously? That we are never fully satisfied? Maybe so. ‘Live and learn’ being the best policy for figuring that one out. So with that in mind, am I right in wondering if it’s peculiar how one can have every possession one desires, yet be bitter, cold and often turn out to

be a manic depressive, for lack of a better phrase, when on the flip side, one who possesses nothing but his health, a kick in his step and a pinch of ‘Jack the lad swag’, can be the happiest man alive. You’d think quite the opposite, no? Which leads me on to my fondness of fine statements; “Shit happens” and “Money can’t buy you happiness” are a couple amongst many, but taking into consideration, the latter, it is both true and false simultaneously. In a political sense, money can buy you the biggest smile ever. Take Mr. Cameron for example, dipping into the treasury and slipping his old pal Greece a few million put a cringe worthy little grin on that delectable grill of his, that we all secretly would take much pleasure in sealing with solvent cement. Even if he claims this was false, it was probably another government conspiracy to fleece every Tom, Dick, Harry and me. Some good could come out of this however, if we spent our money on a switchblade designed for assassinating MP’s, the handle of which would be ergonomically designed for a soft, comfortable grip, I’m positive that we’d be Jim Beam-ing from ear to jail cell but still maintain an optimistic outlook on life. Money well spent to all of the political cynics out there. This also applies to all those whom have no interest in politics at all and simply feel that the Government are not paying them enough job seekers allowance.

In a working class sense, you could splash out on various luxuries, for x number of years/ months/weeks, etc, and never be content with yourself, just with the material goods you purchased and perhaps the Mexican maid you may have recently acquired.

I’ve always stood by one of my own sayings; well it’s more of a personal observation, but makes for a good precept in my opinion, that is, nine times out of ten, you can always estimate a persons wealth and character by the shoes they wear. Upon discovering they have an appalling taste in shoes, then their posture at least is enough to tell one, their social status. Give it a try at some point.

Have you ever felt like just a crack in an entire castle made of glass? In the sense that you’re so insignificant in an ever expanding universe of unimaginable proportion? It’s not that difficult actually, if you take into account that you could fit 1.3 million planet earths into the sun (which is 99.86% of all mass in our solar system) then we as a race are smaller than a pin prick…or your worst enemy’s flaccid penis. If you think of size/proportion from a literal perspective, then yes…you’re going to feel rather inadequate, but if you think about it in terms of ideology, then it’s something entirely different. Ideology in general is pretty amazing, for example: Hitler took an idea, and made it a reality…a dark & sinister example, naturally, but I think it amplified my point. The biggest things have the smallest beginnings.


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